“Those who help others are prone to periods of sickness and ‘burnout’. A life purpose of helping others is often acompanied with great compassion for those who suffer. This often leads to a cycle of exhaustion that can easily lead to ‘burnout’ and frequent illness,” said psychotherapist Yildiz Sethi.
Sethi asks: “How often do you feel drained, exhausted or get sick?”
She says, “Most people in the helping professions struggle with finding a healthy balance. This includes how much to give and for how long. They struggle with their personal and professional boundaries and a tendency for over-responsibility. This may become a compulsion. They can’t do enough.”
“To make this tendency worse we are told by many schools of thought, (spiritual and religious),
- Good people put others first.
- It’s better to give than take.
- Putting yourself first is selfish.”
Sethi said: “As a psychotherapist I became aware I was being inauthentic in encouraging my clients to put themselves first in allocating their priorities, time, health and wellbeing, while I was not doing the same. I had to put my own house in order. ”
“In an airplane we are told to put on our air-masks first in an emergency, so we can help others. If we don’t do this we are in no state to help. We all go down together.”
Further “It remains true that those who see their purpose as a supporter of others feel an impulse to make a difference. People who help people are frequently healers, teachers, nurses, social workers and mental health professionals. They are vulnerable to giving too much and putting themselves last.”
“There is no doubt organizations love such people in their ranks. It is so easy to hook into their innate sense of guilt and over-responsibility and seduce them into becoming ‘workhorses’. If enough of us are sucked into this it has both a financial and structural affect. It changes the workplace culture so fewer employees are required. ‘Workhorses’ work harder and longer than others,” said Sethi. “Those working for themselves do the same. We also don’t know where or when to draw the line.”
Sethi continued: “Now that I have this in order I have plenty of energy. Good professional and personal boundaries. I don’t allow others to take advantage of my good nature and am able to hold others to respectful account when necessary. I am more productive and effective in my work and I have time for my loved ones, hobbies and even a social life. Finally, I am able to voice a healthy ‘no’ when appropriate.”
“It is possible to design a healthy life balance and learn new practical and energetic techniques ro keep you nurtured, healthy and strong.”
These ideas are presented in Yildiz Sethi’s book “Rapid Core Healing for Growth and Emotional Healing” (2016).
Details of the workshop available at: http://familyconstellations.com.au/training_overview/mind-body-spirit-self-care-and-nourishment-for-cousellors-and-mental-health-professionals/
Yildiz Sethi is the founder of two psychotherapies, a clinical hypnotherapist, Family Constellations facilitator and educator/trainer and author of three books. Her latest book “Rapid Core Healing Pathways to Growth and Emotional Healing” (2016). Yildiz lives and runs a private practice in Brisbane, Australia, travelling nationally and globally to train clinicians and run workshops for the general public.
Organisations involved in training or growth interested in courses or applications may contact Yildiz Sethi on firstname.lastname@example.org
These ideas are presented in her book Rapid Core Healing Pathways to Growth and Emotional Healing” (2016).